You probably heard whispers in the spring, but nothing could be confirmed. No doubt you saw the speculative news pieces over the summer after employees at our printing facility were bribed to comment off the record. And anyone not living in a cave couldn’t miss the whistleblower interview last month in which our textile specialist told a reporter that the 2023 holiday season was going to be covered in mouse blood due to the upcoming merch drop.
We are now in a position to confirm it all, and to apologize for initiating so many lawsuits. Introducing the W.A.S. Holiday Jumper (a.k.a. the Christmas Crewneck, a.k.a. The Green Inferno). Among the most casually violent winter-wear available this season, it’s also darn comfortable, and toasty warm. Equally appropriate by the fireside and at the office party, it is casually elegant, with a repulsive message.
We’re taking orders now, and plan to ship on the first of December. Get yours here.
Customers ordering from our UK store may also want to consider picking up a Mystery Box, which comes with an unspecified combination of music, clothing, and band autographs, at a big discount. You accept ignorance in exchange for money, is how it works. A thrill that’s perfect for gamblers.
🌲🎄🌲🎄🌲🌲🎄🌲🎄🎄🌲🌲🎄🌲🎄🌲🌲🎄🌲🎄🎄🌲
Coming to S.D.I.R. later today, track 5 from Lobes Reduced, and, outside the internet, in the ReallyVerse, our first Salt Lake City show since 2014.
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Guess that credit card I just paid off is longer paid off 🤷♀️
Just delightful. This jumper lies at the very intersection of my core interests. The only downside is that it won't arrive in time for my office Christmas party, the dress code of which is – appropriately – 'GLAMOUR PUSS' (🫥). I may wear a printout of it instead. Plus other clothes.