I am as impressed here by the cogency of your reasoning as I am by the fastidiousness of your punctuation, which - in this and every WAS missive - is frankly impeccable. (You do miss one comma in the parenthetical, “though as discussed above, this appears unlikely” [sic], but I can only imagine you must have been writing at exhilarated speed.)
The only problem with trusting Bono’s sound judgement, I humbly venture, is his own unmistakable high regard for the rock band U2. Now, while not without significant contribution to the world’s store of valuable, albeit human-sanctioned, culture, this is a group of which we would expect a more rigorously critical assessment from someone we regard as a bona fide arbiter of this planet’s artistic achievement. So, who does that leave, if not Dolly Parton, The Mandalorian, or, indeed, The Lawnmower Man? Tilda Swinton is a perfectly acceptable substitute, I agree, and yet she’s no Cate Blanchett. Who is? I would suggest Cate Blanchett.
For she is the rose. And hers is the kiss.
Also, there’s a good chance that she would rightly select Ace of Bass over Seal.
You make a genuinely compelling argument for Bono here- but the forced album download on iPhone is too glaring an error to overlook, and ultimately calls his judgement into question too heavily for his word to be unimpeachable.
Instead, allow me to offer the following candidate:
•Twenty-nine years older than Bono
•A career spanning over seven decades; stage, screen, television, music and literature
•International icon status; also recognizable by a single name…and he’s been to space.
Having read this post and slept on it, I’ve come to the conclusion that it couldn’t be the responsibility of Bono (or anyone else for that matter) alone. But maybe you have a point and he is the correct leader for this...
But really is it up to anyone? Sure, the Daniels et al just took home a bunch of Oscars, but I’m pretty sure they’d already WON with Everything Everywhere All At Once without the approval of the academy. I suspect Seal already knows he’s won this 🦭
I *knew* my spreadsheet of Living International Treasures would come in handy one day!! I'm not even joking. I feel I have truly found My People here 🤓
Who amongst us cannot say that they would weigh the judgement of Tilda Swinton on matters artistic more greatly than that of Bono. A match on seriousness and humility, a superior on perspective and ingenuity.
Tilda Swinton is a strong option. I (Chris) would accept her decision (and I suspect it would be Seal), but I wonder whether she’s a big enough star to curry favor across the planet. Is she a household name in Saudi Arabia? Laos? — is she even a household name in the US?
When considering Bono you seem to have failed to consider his band mate, The Edge. A man of similar age and experiences, but who has shown better taste in choosing his stage name. He'll still choose Seal, obviously.
You make a strong case which I feel unable to contest (at least at this point on a Sunday night). Also, this:
“But even a generous assessment of these abstract works in red ochre must ultimately allow for their inferiority to the oeuvre of singer-songwriter-producer Seal.”
is definitely the funniest sentence I’ve read today. 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
In 1992, Jeff Fahey lit up screens and delighted worldwide audiences with his turn as Jobe Smith in 'The Lawnmower Man'. In the following 30 year period, Fahey has constantly defied expectations and largely rejected the mainstream in favour of passion projects that quench the thirst of the artistic visions he craves. Never heard of most of them? Not my problem, Joe Hollywood. I just watched The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences give best actor Oscars to George of the Jungle and Short Round from Indiana Jones, you're gonna question why a visionary like Fahey wants to tread his own path?
Now, I'm not definitively saying that Jeff Fahey is the greatest artist of all time, but I think all of the above is an argument as to why he is perhaps best positioned to say who is. The man does not seek accolades or riches, just a dogged pursuit to create the best art he can. And as Wayne, his character in 2022's 'The Long Night' probably said, "that's all I ever needed, baby"
Pedro Pascal is great, but yeah, he needs at least 20 more years of fame curing his reputation before it’ll be ready to support a major call like “Seal is the all-time best artist”
Even if Bono were to pick the ‘greatest artist of all time’ he wouldn’t pick someone who would play a gig in Chechnya for their President Ramzan Kadyrov, and refusing to apologise for it.
I am as impressed here by the cogency of your reasoning as I am by the fastidiousness of your punctuation, which - in this and every WAS missive - is frankly impeccable. (You do miss one comma in the parenthetical, “though as discussed above, this appears unlikely” [sic], but I can only imagine you must have been writing at exhilarated speed.)
The only problem with trusting Bono’s sound judgement, I humbly venture, is his own unmistakable high regard for the rock band U2. Now, while not without significant contribution to the world’s store of valuable, albeit human-sanctioned, culture, this is a group of which we would expect a more rigorously critical assessment from someone we regard as a bona fide arbiter of this planet’s artistic achievement. So, who does that leave, if not Dolly Parton, The Mandalorian, or, indeed, The Lawnmower Man? Tilda Swinton is a perfectly acceptable substitute, I agree, and yet she’s no Cate Blanchett. Who is? I would suggest Cate Blanchett.
For she is the rose. And hers is the kiss.
Also, there’s a good chance that she would rightly select Ace of Bass over Seal.
Seconding the love when it comes to punctuation. Genuinely one of my favourite things about these newsletters.
You make a genuinely compelling argument for Bono here- but the forced album download on iPhone is too glaring an error to overlook, and ultimately calls his judgement into question too heavily for his word to be unimpeachable.
Instead, allow me to offer the following candidate:
•Twenty-nine years older than Bono
•A career spanning over seven decades; stage, screen, television, music and literature
•International icon status; also recognizable by a single name…and he’s been to space.
Shatner.
Shatner!!! Yes!!!!
Having read this post and slept on it, I’ve come to the conclusion that it couldn’t be the responsibility of Bono (or anyone else for that matter) alone. But maybe you have a point and he is the correct leader for this...
But really is it up to anyone? Sure, the Daniels et al just took home a bunch of Oscars, but I’m pretty sure they’d already WON with Everything Everywhere All At Once without the approval of the academy. I suspect Seal already knows he’s won this 🦭
Honestly, I was going with Beyonce until the 51% less living factor was brought up. That was a close call for me, I'm back on team Bono.
Dolly Parton.
100% seconded!
I *knew* my spreadsheet of Living International Treasures would come in handy one day!! I'm not even joking. I feel I have truly found My People here 🤓
Who else is on this spreadsheet?
At last count:
Dolly Parton
Tom Jones
Judi Dench
Tom Hanks
Usain Bolt
Julie Andrews
Meryl Streep
Keanu Reeves
Morgan Freeman
Dick Van Dyke
Roger Federer
Emma Thompson
Samuel L Jackson
Jeff Goldblum
Adele
Mariah Carey
Rowan Atkinson
Beyonce
The Dalai Lama
Britney
Also: it's not just a spreadsheet. It's a game...
That needs further explanation!
Who amongst us cannot say that they would weigh the judgement of Tilda Swinton on matters artistic more greatly than that of Bono. A match on seriousness and humility, a superior on perspective and ingenuity.
Tilda Swinton is a strong option. I (Chris) would accept her decision (and I suspect it would be Seal), but I wonder whether she’s a big enough star to curry favor across the planet. Is she a household name in Saudi Arabia? Laos? — is she even a household name in the US?
Indeed. It's an International Treasure you require.
☝️
How I wish Robin Williams were still alive.
When considering Bono you seem to have failed to consider his band mate, The Edge. A man of similar age and experiences, but who has shown better taste in choosing his stage name. He'll still choose Seal, obviously.
Yeah, we may just be splitting hairs at this point.
You make a strong case which I feel unable to contest (at least at this point on a Sunday night). Also, this:
“But even a generous assessment of these abstract works in red ochre must ultimately allow for their inferiority to the oeuvre of singer-songwriter-producer Seal.”
is definitely the funniest sentence I’ve read today. 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
We forgot someone. Bill Nighy.
You’re too good at this!
It's a niche skill.
Oh!...NICOLAS CAGE.
Sting
-just as pretentious
-single name as well
-older than Bono
-has an acting career
-known activist
-he's an englishman, far easier to persuade others when it comes from a man with an English accent rather than an Irish accent
-has convinced people to come to his 2023 shows despite naming his tour "My Songs"....no work went into that.
U2 had Apple download their album into Apple users phones without their permission. Resulted in anger and bad press.
-The Police were entered into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame before U2
I think there's an argument for Jeff Fahey from The Lawnmower Man
Say more.
Yes, of course, I can do this...
In 1992, Jeff Fahey lit up screens and delighted worldwide audiences with his turn as Jobe Smith in 'The Lawnmower Man'. In the following 30 year period, Fahey has constantly defied expectations and largely rejected the mainstream in favour of passion projects that quench the thirst of the artistic visions he craves. Never heard of most of them? Not my problem, Joe Hollywood. I just watched The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences give best actor Oscars to George of the Jungle and Short Round from Indiana Jones, you're gonna question why a visionary like Fahey wants to tread his own path?
Now, I'm not definitively saying that Jeff Fahey is the greatest artist of all time, but I think all of the above is an argument as to why he is perhaps best positioned to say who is. The man does not seek accolades or riches, just a dogged pursuit to create the best art he can. And as Wayne, his character in 2022's 'The Long Night' probably said, "that's all I ever needed, baby"
This is a great argument. I second your choice. I also just laughed out loud at your Oscar reference. Brilliant!
Bono already thinks he is the greatest artist of all time and so this just won’t work
Alas, we finally disagree on something.
I simply wouldn’t trust Bono’s opinion on the matter, and as I don’t want to be mean I’ll keep my reasons to myself.
For an alternative artist with all of Bono’s finest qualities as described here, may I chuck Pedro Pascal’s name in for consideration?
Or perhaps it shouldn’t be left to just one person to decide?
Not to mention that such statement “x person is the greatest artist of all time” it’s simply impossible to answer as we haven’t seen all time yet!
I would like to second the nomination of Pedro Pascal!
Surely Pascal's current cultural ascendency will prove to be fleeting? Bono's celebrity is timeless. But not as unending as Dolly Parton's.
Pedro Pascal is great, but yeah, he needs at least 20 more years of fame curing his reputation before it’ll be ready to support a major call like “Seal is the all-time best artist”
It’s ok to admit one was wrong, just confess you forgot about him while writing this article and that Pascal is clearly the superior choice 😜
I salute your tenacity here 😂
Feels like Pedro Pascal is a mere babe compared to Bono.
He might be 15 years younger, but Pascal is a man of culture and great taste that hasn’t let fame get to his head!
This is really one to be decided by
Ron Clontle, author of Rock, Rot, & Rule
Even if Bono were to pick the ‘greatest artist of all time’ he wouldn’t pick someone who would play a gig in Chechnya for their President Ramzan Kadyrov, and refusing to apologise for it.